On Saturday 25th January 2025 , the day the planets aligned, at 14:12, we said goodbye to Pete, our Dad. Dad was a spiritual man in later years  , born on  07.07.47 , passed away aged 77 and there is a great significance in these numbers. 

In line with his wishes, Dad's body has been donated to Nottingham University Medical School where  doctors and surgeons will use it to understand about new methods and it will allow healthcare professionals to develop their skills and new  techniques to improve  care and quality of life  for people in the future. We are immensely proud of our Dad for doing this and grateful that we have been able to uphold his wishes.

In the absence of a funeral and a wake, we have created this page to tell you about our Dad . This is not a eulogy, it wont tell you about his life , his family, his childhood growing up , his career or what he meant to other people , it is our reflections on him as our Dad.  If you would like to share your own tribute, funny stories or memories of Dad here, we would love to read them .

Our Dad

An unconventional Dad , a fun Dad, never a 9-5pm Dad, one that swore like a trooper  ,  a Dad that would make fart noises in lifts and look around disgusted, a Dad that would send inappropriate memes and  set off fireworks without reading the instructions. He was a  Dad that would attend parents evenings and announce in a loud voice ‘ You can tell that teacher I wont be going with her again !’  A Dad that loved to embarrass us and make us laugh, a Dad that fiercely protected us from anyone that tried to hurt us . We were his Soldier and his Bec-Bec.

He had a tendency to break the rules, to take risks and  to live life on the edge.  He would tell us elaborate stories about smoking the peace pipe with native Indians in Canada, touring with famous  bands, racing motorbikes at the Isle of Man TT  and smoking weed in Amsterdam . We never knew what might come out of his mouth , particularly at a dinner table with people he had not met before. He loved to be outrageous and everyone that met him instantly loved his enormous character and persona.

Dad would let us watch horror films and jumped out at us from under the stairs, he  would take us asleep from our beds and we would wake up in Cornwall in a caravan, he went on roller coasters at Alton Towers when we called him a  chicken and he had a full size mannequin in the kitchen window to make people laugh. Many people have asked us what it was like to have him as a Dad, if you watch the film Big Fish with Ewan McGregor, it was a lot like that .

Dad was an amazing guitarist and a brilliant singer.  He  loved all genres of music and a lot of our early music choices were influenced by him. Neil Young ,Joan Armatrading,  The Beatles, blasting out Dire Straits as we sailed through Newark on a canal boat. He was an avid lover of  films, particularly anything by Martin Scorsese or Tarantino. He loved the Sopranos and anything gangster and often quoted from Goodfellas to make us laugh. He also secretly liked Eastenders and we spent many nights texting each other over the storylines but I know he wouldn’t have wanted me to tell anyone this !

Dad loved cars and motorbikes. He brought Damien a petrol motorbike at 4 years old and we used to ride on the back of his motorbike when we were young . He used to let us sit in the boot of his car which we loved . He had a love for Mercedes, or any cars, the faster the better.  He bought an ambulance home once and said it would be a great tour bus . There was another time he bought  a hearse and said that it had been driven very carefully with low mileage!

Dad was a highly intelligent man ,he taught us about Shakespeare, introduced us to live theatre, English literature, taught us how to play chess and talked about politics . He knew everything there was to know about most things and was very well read and had an impressive vocabulary , often peppered with swear words! 

Dad was an emotional and a sensitive man. If we talked about his grandchildren, whom they called Naughty Poppa Pete,  he would cry  with pride.  He gave up his Christmas Days to be Father Christmas to the local children in need .He talked about his family and his  Mum, Eileen, who he loved a lot.  He had a deep love for animals, especially dogs. Damien said to him , ‘ Imagine if when you pass you are greeted by a  field of your old  dogs’  This made him smile . We often joked he liked dogs more than he liked people and every time there was a dog in the hospice, I would grab it and plonk it on his bed so he could pet it. 

Dad had a stroke in the last 3 days of his life which was painful to see and made it difficult to communicate. He said to Damien ‘ I never thought it was possible to love someone as much as he loved him ‘ which was beautiful and we will never forget. His last words to me was  ‘ W*nkers ‘ when I told him I got a speeding ticket for going 26mph which still makes me laugh now. Even as poorly as he was,  he was  never afraid to say what he means and show his disdain for the rules. 

We are grateful for the weeks we spent by his side in the hospice, despite the sadness and impending grief , we laughed a lot  together. We had banter about his awful bleached  blonde perm when he was younger, we recalled memories from times together and talked about family, friends and  last wishes. Dad was happiest when it was us 3 together, our little family unit and the energy and unconditional love we had together can never be replicated. On the first day in the hospice there was a picture on his wall that was entitled ' Who Dares Wins' and we thought that was perfectly apt 

As the time approached , we weren’t sure how Dad would go as we knew his favourite poem by Dylan Thomas said
'Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light'
However, there was no raging , which surprised us about Dad as he loved to rage about things ! Instead there was peace, tranquillity and  a final acceptance of death.  We had talked about it , prepared for it and we gave each other permission to let go . We told Dad at the start of the cancer that we would both be with him every step of the way, we defiantly stuck to our word  and we are blessed to have been able to do this, despite the immense pain of it all.  

Dad  – You always were the main man, the big shooter, a cool dude , the dogs b*llocks , a totally unique human being that we were fortunate  to have loved so much and knew you loved us with every ounce of your being . We know that you’ve not gone for you are part of Damien and I . Everyone that knows us , or we meet,  sees you in us  . You are in  our behaviours, characteristics and personality . We have your sense of humour , we love the same  music and films, you are in  the way Damien tells his stories and you are in me  in this cows lick hairline of mine and my passion for social justice. You are in the way you taught us  to ‘ not take any shit from anyone’ and to always love your family hard , unconditionally and never be afraid to show it. Within Dame and I , we pass bits of your parenting and your personality  to our own children . When we look at them and at  each other ,  we will always  take comfort and remember the monumental  man mountain, the legacy and the legend that was you , our Dad.

With eternal love beyond measure  x


Thank you 

To his family and friends

Dad asked us to thank you for being part of his journey over the last 77 years and the memories you created together which comforted him in his final weeks. Whether you were a small part of  his life  , or there for a  majority of it,  he expressed his gratitude to you all. We feel fortunate to have been able to tell people what was happening so you could say your own goodbyes before he went and we thank you for your calls,  messages, your videos, pictures and those that came to visit him at home , the hospital and the hospice. We read his messages to him daily  and they bought us all comfort in his final days, knowing that he made a remarkable  difference in people’s lives. 

To Mo

Who enabled Dad to be nearer to his family after his move from the South and who committed herself to caring for him over the last year through the most difficult and challenging period of his life. We will be  always grateful for your kindness, love and dedication Mo.

To our amazing  NHS 

When we started out 20 weeks ago on this awful journey of cancer, we were in a blur of hospital appointments, medical procedures , diagnoses and prognosis’s. We met many people who supported our family along the way and every single professional that we met showed us the most kindness and compassion. From his GP ,  the consultant who sat and rubbed Dads back when he told us the cancer had spread, the upper GI nurses who explained things when we couldn’t process it,  to the oncologist that talked us through next steps, the palliative care team who answered all our concerns and worries,  the carers that came to look after him at home, the Macmillan nurses who offered emotional support and the hospital ward  staff when he needed medical intervention.

To John Eastwood Hospice

In the last 2 weeks of Dads life, he went into John Eastwood Hospice and we are eternally grateful for their support and care of Dad and of us.  These people really are angels that walk the  earth , nothing was ever too much trouble for them as they ensured Dad was comfortable and kept his dignity and pride at all times.  They wiped our tears, hugged us tight when we became overwhelmed and felt at breaking point , made us cups of tea and talked to us about what was happening to Dad so we could understand it.
In the last few moments of his life, the hospice staff enabled and empowered us to be strong enough to be with Dad as we had promised we would. Without them we would not have been able to make it  through the last 2 weeks,  or be at his side when he went and we will always, always  be forever indebted to them  for that.

If you would like to support John Eastwood Hospice to help other families like they helped ours,  we have added a donation button to this page.  The care and support they provide is priceless and although we can never repay them for what they did for Dad and for us ,  we know every little bit of money helps.

Thank you to everyone for your support, your kind words and your condolences. There is a big Pete shaped hole in our lives right now but we know that someday soon , we will smile ,  laugh and probably swear loudly  when we think of him

Dame and Beke x